Heading back to school for many students is exciting but can also be nerve-racking. Our son will be heading to the second grade but will not be returning to his old school since we moved to a new place this summer. Similar to many children who experience transitions like this, he has expressed anxiety and fears about everything that comes with attending a new school but this experience has also reminded me that there is plenty we can learn from our little ones.
Listen and Acknowledge Our Children’s Emotions
Moving, of course, is something that we anticipated would have a big effect on our children. Moving is a big deal for anyone. It is overwhelming, stressful and often, emotional, making it even more important to discuss any concerns our kids may have to help them cope with the changes.
One of the things I have learned as a parent and have been reminded of from our move is that we can help our kids process situations like this by taking time to listen to them. Acknowledge how they are feeling and encourage them to be open with you and not afraid to express themselves.
Speaking of emotions, we watched the movie, “Inside Out” a few weeks before our move. Talk about perfect timing! Don’t worry, I’ll try not to give too much away if you haven’t seen it yet. It does remind me of another lesson I learned long ago as a parent…
Children Are Not Mini Adults
I personally appreciate this movie because it shows the struggle that Riley has with adjusting to new situations through a child’s point of view. Our son could relate to the plot, helping paint a clearer picture for us on the possible feelings he could be experiencing since he was able to share Riley’s emotional struggles. It inspires us as parents to discuss the changes that are happening with our own kids, to make sure they know they can talk about their feelings with us.
Understandably, our son has mixed feelings about the move. We were afraid to add that the move meant he would not be returning to his school but we knew he would find out eventually! We told him that his old school would be further away since our new home is in Clay County instead of Duval County.
He does a good job with explaining to us how his happy memories are going to be touched with a little bit of sadness. Some days, he will say things like:
Other days, he will say:
As the new school year approaches, we have been working on being positive about the changes. We did things like take him with us to enroll at the new school, showed him around the new neighborhood and all the places in the nearby area that would interest him in hopes that we could influence him to be more excited.
It is important for us to keep in mind that for our son, these are not small changes. In fact, the person that this move has affected the most in terms of adjustment is our son. My husband and I do not have to switch jobs the way our son has to switch schools.
Children Are Resilient
I am proud of how my son has handled the move. He is showing how resilient and adaptable children can be. Although he is nervous about this upcoming school year, his attitude has been mostly positive. Every now and then, he will bring up that he is worried about the new school but he never says it in a whiny, childish way.
I did an exercise with him to help him deal with the move by asking him to write out what he is feeling. He wrote about what he was worried about but also what he was excited about this school year. I love this sentence he wrote:
I appreciate that he is able to acknowledge that he is sad while making an effort to focus on the positive things he can look forward to, such as the subjects he enjoys learning.
Children Can Be Great Teachers
It reminds me that when I jumped into this whole motherhood journey, he has been running right along side of me, learning from me but also teaching me things that often blow me away. I am constantly learning something new from my kids, more than I thought I would. So even though I’m not heading back to school, I know my kids will be teaching me something new sooner or later!
Has your child had to move or switch schools?
