Fly little bird! Fly! What an exciting time as a parent! Your baby just graduated from high school. How is that possible? It seems like just yesterday that they graduated from kindergarten with that sweet little baby face. And now they’re considered an adult and are going off to college? Without parental supervision? Are they ready for this? Surely not. Just last week I had to remind him to brush his teeth. How can he possibly handle college by himself? Will he wake up on time? How will he get to class? Will he make friends? What if he gets lonely? What if he only eats junk food??
Mom, relax. Take a deep breath, and focus all of that nervous energy on the love you have for your child. Now think back to when you graduated from high school. Man, we were smart! *wink* And our parents knew nothing. Right? But we figured it all out, and so will your child. This is a pivotal point in their lives where it’s crucial for them to start becoming independent. After all, that’s the goal of a parent, right? To raise an independent, strong, kind, human who can face the world on their own? Well if that’s the goal, we’re not going to get there by doing everything for them. And no one wants a 30-year-old failure to launch living under their roof, eating Cheetos, sleeping in, and playing video games all day long.
So, how do we help them succeed?
Life Skills
Set your child up for success by making sure they know important life skills like time management, laundry, cooking, car care, and managing a budget. Your child should now be setting their own alarm to get out of bed in the morning and be productive throughout the day. They should also be able to prepare food for themselves. Now we all know that there’s nothing like mama’s cooking, but your kid needs to have a few recipes they can prepare with their eyes closed. The same goes for car care. Teach your child how to take care of their car, when to get an oil change, what to do when they get a flat tire, etc. How to manage their finances should also be taught. Help them set a budget, and walk them through how to make the most of their money.
READ: Nothing Will Prepare You For the Dreaded College Drop-Off
Set Expectations
Help your child track important deadlines like dorm room sign-ups and parking pass applications. Again, this doesn’t mean doing it for them. Have your child do the research to find the deadlines, show them how to put these deadlines in their schedule, and help them create an action plan to accomplish each goal. Your job is to follow up and make sure they’re on schedule to meet those deadlines. Do not do the work for them.
Let Them Stumble
Don’t be afraid to let your young adult stumble along the way. Inevitably your child will miss a deadline, or get a low grade. When it happens, don’t try to rescue them from the consequences of their actions. Instead, be there to lift them up and support them through finding a way to recover from their mistakes. Again, don’t do the work for them. Just love and support them. This is tough because we never want to see our children fail or hurt, but this could be how they learn important lessons along their journey to adulthood.
Celebrate the Wins
Celebrate their successes! If they get great grades, celebrate it! If they join a fun new club and make new friends, celebrate it! If they make the Dean’s List, celebrate it! Let’s use positive reinforcement to celebrate their wins and let them know how proud we are of them. Send the email, write the letter, and send the cookies. Celebrate those wins, Mama, and shower your kid with all the love and support only a mommy can shine down on her child.
READ: The Nest
When all else fails… take a deep breath and say a little prayer. You’ve got this, Mama.
College Dorm Move-In Checklist
Desk Items
- Multi-outlet plug-in strip
- Highlighters
- Stapler and staples
- Rubber bands
- Paper clips
- Poster tack
- Markers
- Binders
- Paper
- Post-Its
- Tape
- Pushpins
- Note cards
- Safety pins
- Desk lamp
- Pencil holder
- Pencil sharpener
- Pens
- 3-hole punch
- Ruler
- Scissors
- Calculator
Shower Items
- Shower shoes
- Bathroom caddy
- Toothbrush
- Toothbrush holder
- Toothpaste
- Soap
- Bar soap container
- Shampoo & conditioner
- Shaving kit
- Cosmetics
- Deodorant
- Bathrobe
Laundry Items
- Laundry basket or bag
- Detergent
- Fabric softener or dryer sheets
- Bleach
- Hangers
- Iron or steamer
- Ironing board
Linens
- Towels
- Washcloths
- Blankets
- Sheets
- Pillows
Appliances
- Microwave
- Mini refrigerator
- Coffee maker or tea kettle
- Television
- Computer
- Fan
- Alarm clock
- Water filter
- Floor lamp
- Blow dryer
- Curling iron
What are some of your top college readiness tips?