It’s a common scenario played out at dinner tables everywhere – a family sits down to a shared meal when a picky eater threatens to ruin that unifying experience that so many parents look forward at least once a day. Nothing is more disruptive than dealing with a finicky child who questions every morsel on his or her plate or only eats a few select items. But instead of always giving in, here are a few tips moms and dads can use to help ease the transition from a fussy dinner companion to adventurous eater.
A Little Patience and Repetition
While the urge is there for parents to expect a child to accept what’s on the plate, the truth is it may take several times of being exposed to a particular food before a child will try it. “You may have to present a food a dozen times because they are often slow to try new tastes and textures,” said Kerry Glidewell, SLP, a pediatric speech language pathologist with Wolfson Children’s Rehabilitation. “Whatever you do, though, you should never force a child to eat.”
Part of a successful approach is how well you communicate. Instead of just saying “eat it,” Glidewell recommends using more encouraging instructions such as lick, chew, kiss, crunch, bite, and smell, which helps familiarize a child with the food they are about to try without pressuring them. Using descriptive language like juicy, soft and sweet when talking about new foods also helps children make familiar connections. Making goals realistic and clear helps, too. Be specific about the number of bites or licks, for example, so there is a clear idea when the activity will begin and end. Setting expectations go a long way towards managing behavior and what your child may or may not do at the table.
“Always try to end a meal on a positive note and with some sort of compliance, too,” added Glidewell, a mother of two who struggles to get her 7-year-old son to eat his vegetables and try new things. “You don’t want to end a food trial with a child pitching a fit as they may learn that negative behavior is what has gotten them out of meal time.”
Don’t Be Afraid of Getting Messy
While the thought of a mess probably makes you cringe, it might be a key to encouraging your child to try new things. Little ones experience things with all of their senses, including touch, and eating is an experience. It may not be proper table manners to allow your child to play with food, but conceding to this hands-on experience is a useful part of the process. It’s important for both parents to set a positive mood from the start of the meal to reinforce good mealtime habits.
What About Nutrition?
Whether a child is actually putting enough food into his or her mouth is something many parents worry about. But aside from learning about new foods, flavors, and textures, toddlers typically go through a natural decline in growth, which is accompanied by a decrease in appetite, too. Foods get pushed away during this time, even those they would usually eat with no problem.
According to Catherine Wallace, MSH, RDN, LD/N, a pediatric clinical dietitian at Wolfson Children’s Hospital, and mom to a 6-year-old boy and 4-year-old girl, the best thing concerned parents can do is to continue to offer a variety of nutritious food whether or not it’s eaten. “Growth is often a parental concern during this time, but kids will grow and thrive when provided safe and nutritious food in the proper amounts,” Wallace said. “The role of the parent is to provide nutritious foods and the role of the child is to choose which foods from the ones provided they will eat, and how much.”
When There’s More to It Than Pickiness
Although finicky eaters are common, some pushback may be caused by an underlying problem. Watchful parents might pick up on subtle signs, including trouble drinking from a cup, overstuffing the mouth with food or allowing it to collect in the cheeks, refusal to swallow, an aversion to textures, inability to transition to table foods, and even failure to thrive. Parents should bring up any concerns related to these behaviors with a pediatrician who can determine if oral weakness or another problem exists. That’s when pediatric speech language pathologists at the Little Bites Feeding Program at Wolfson Children’s Rehabilitation can step in to create a program that involves the input of pediatric physicians, nutritionists, behavioral specialists and occupational therapists that help a child work through issues to successfully reach developmental feeding milestones. “We educate parents and caregivers to use the proper techniques so they can transition what is learned with us into the child’s natural environment,” said Glidewell. “We also specialize in feeding for children with complex medical issues.”
For more information or a referral form for the Little Bites Feeding Program at Wolfson Children’s Hospital, call 904.346.0394.
Tips to Maintain Positive Eating Habits
To keep meal planning and feeding as simple as possible, Wallace recommends creating a healthy eating environment, and provides the following tips:
- Offer three meals and a few daily snacks with age-appropriate servings.
- Try serving meals and snacks at the same time each day.
- Eat together as a family as often as possible.
- Avoid sugary drinks (fruit punch/drinks, sports drinks, soda) and limit fruit juice to no more than six ounces daily.
- Talk about food with your child, involve them at the grocery store and in the kitchen, and be a good role model.
- Instead of saying, “Do you want broccoli with your dinner?” say, “Would you like carrots or broccoli tonight?”
- To minimize a fight at meal time, remember to say, “You don’t have to eat it.” This may help diffuse anger and anxiety when an item appears on the plate that is not wanted.
