I’ve been dreaming the same image in my head since January. It’s a crowded street in Boston. The road is lined with cheering fans, a human tunnel of encouragement. At the end of the road, there’s a blue and yellow finish line painted on the pavement and a welcoming sign that I finished. I’m running down that street with tired legs and a lump in my throat because I really did it. I actually ran The Boston Marathon!
The first inkling of this dream happened on a leisurely run with a group of moms three years ago. I don’t remember much except I was just happy to be out of the house. I had a one-year-old and a three-year-old whom I loved more than I knew possible. And I was quickly learning that parenting could be exhausting physically and emotionally.
On the run, we discussed a mutual friend who was trying to qualify for the Boston Marathon. Truth be told I didn’t even know what qualifying actually meant but I was wowed anyway. One of the moms said we should run Boston too. She was serious and confident…and looking at me like we should try it like soon. I thought she was crazy but something inside me stirred.
Looking back, I think this was the first time I realized that it was okay to dream again. It sounds silly but when your babies need every ounce of you for their existence, your dreams quietly take a back seat and rightfully so. As your children grow, the majority of your time is doing this and that for them and/or your family etc. to make them well rounded and balanced, successful, hardworking, confident little people ready to take on the world when its their turn. It is as time consuming as it is rewarding. As a mother, we are one of our children’s most influential role models. Shouldn’t we strive to be all of those things we hope they will be ourselves?
After more runs, conversations and prodding from my friends, I decided to dream big. One day I would run that Boston Marathon (which I learned meant first running a marathon under a certain time in order to be accepted into Boston). I knew it would require commitment, sacrifice and hard work. I wrestled with the unknowns, would I be able to find time for these training runs? Will my husband be okay watching the girls (and vice versa, ha ha!)? What if I miss something important because I’m running, blah blah. The list seemed endless. I was basically talking myself out of my dream until I focused on what my kids would gain.
Following your own dreams help your children build their own. It is important for them to see their parents chase a goal. Valuable lessons about time management, dedication and perseverance are better seen in action than in theory. Pursuing a dream also allows a mother that much needed outlet. I knew I had a desire to pursue this dream but I felt as if I needed permission to do something a little bit selfish. Would motherhood frown upon my decision? Am I allowed to do something for me? Yes, mothers you are. And ironically, this selfish thing will actually make you a better, more sane and more giving mother because you had that me time!!
On Boylston Street April 20, 2015, my dream came true. I finished the Boston Marathon and ran 21 miles with that friend who put the idea in my heart. Who were my most excited fans cheering me on (and fighting over my shiny medal)? My girls. They were overflowing with pride because they knew it how hard and how long I had worked to achieve my goal. We celebrated my accomplishment together that night with a cake they decorated just for me, one of my treasured mommy moments.
Go after the impossible because you really have nothing to lose. I’m not saying you should run a marathon (though I sincerely hope you will because there’s nothing like it). I do think everyone, especially moms, should dream big.
If you love to paint, paint. If you love to write, write. Whatever gift you have, don’t stop using it because you are too busy with life and parenthood. You can make the time. Your goals do matter. There will always be reasons not to pursue your dream. Your circumstances are not the exception to my dream big rule. I can guarantee you will make sacrifices, you will work hard and it will be tough. The example you set will be powerful and one of the best gifts your children can receive.
