Over a decade ago, my son was diagnosed with multiple severe food allergies. Back then, there weren’t any support groups to lean on. We lived far away from our families and were completely clueless about where to begin or how to manage life this way.
As the years progressed, we had to figure it all out on our own — the good, the bad, and the ugly. There were times when we avoided large gatherings altogether to keep our little guy safe. Other times, I’d have a borderline panic attack over the fact that all I could see was unsafe food EVERYWHERE. The rapid thoughts on replay suffocated me. It could fall on his head. He could pick it up off the floor. Someone might feed him something deadly. It was all encompassing, and I’m not proud to say that I made my fair share of snappy comments to other unsuspecting parents.
READ: That Food Allergy Life: Please Pass On the Pity
Fast forward to today, and I am proud to say that I’ve grown quite a bit from those early years. Do food allergies still absolutely suck? Hell yeah! But I have learned to deal with them with much more grace and confidence than I once did. These are the tips and tricks that our family learned while we were flailing around in the dark of managing food allergies.
Tips for the Party Hostess
Offer food swaps for those with special dietary needs. When it comes to planning parties, there are numerous safe and delicious options for treats to share! I like to find out ahead of time if there will be any kiddos attending who need special dietary accommodations, and then find the equivalent swaps that will be served at the party. For example, if cupcakes will be served as the main dessert, I like to grab a pack of Abe’s muffins as the swap item. Most grocery stores offer a variety of flavors. Just be careful to make sure that the variety suits your guests’ food allergy needs.
Consider food placement. When setting up the spread of food, consider placing the highest allergen foods off to the side, away from the allergy-friendly options. Think: Setting the deviled eggs or mixed nuts at one end of the table away from, say, the potato chips. Providing safe (approved by the food allergy guest) single-serving snacks that cannot touch the unsafe foods is another great option!
Tips for Parents of a Food-Allergy Hero
Keep an open dialogue. When attending a party, I keep a very open dialogue with the hostess and over-communicate my son’s food allergies. If the hostess feels confident in accommodating him to plan safe food items, great! If not, I will get the party menu from the hostess ahead of time and find safe swaps for him. We pack all of his food in a cooler and just make a plate for him to enjoy when the time is appropriate.
Request to make the first plate — this is crucial! This ensures that no unsafe dishes or items have been cross-contaminated into those that are safe. When in doubt, only go for those single-serve packets or pack along a safe snack just in case!
All in all, communication is key! Ensure that you find the best way to accommodate individuals with food allergies. Some families may be comfortable, while others are not. It can be tricky sometimes, but it can be done. My biggest mistake in managing party etiquette over the years has been assuming that the hostess would not want to go through the trouble of inclusion, when it was exactly the opposite!
READ: The Ultimate Guide to Dining Out With Food Allergies in Jacksonville
