It’s no secret that we live in a time of hyper-partisan politics where we, and unfortunately our children, are inundated with clickbait, misinformation, and inflammatory content. Right now, we are a day shy of Election Day, and the tension amongst our community, the state, and the nation is palpable. We, as the adults, aren’t the only ones who feel the tension — there’s a trickle-down impact on our children. Which is why, regardless of where we land on the political spectrum, one thing that we share, as parents, is the duty to help our children understand what the election is and the importance of voting.
You may or may not be like me in that it can feel very intimidating to talk about things like politics and elections with anyone, especially your kids. With civics, elections, and government being subjects that we all learned about in school growing up, why is it so intimidating? For me, it’s because I feel an enormous amount of pressure to “get it right,” and that feels impossible to do when there is so much uncertainty and chaos. I don’t necessarily mean the uncertainty of the outcome of the election. I mean the unsteadiness that I feel about the chaos surrounding it. With that being said, I wanted to share something with all of you that has been comforting to me about this.
The most comforting thing I’ve been told and that I’ve read is that it’s okay to not have all the answers. It’s okay to tell our children that we do not know the answer to their question(s). Our children don’t need us to have all the right answers. What they do need is for us to be curious about what they think and to allow them to be curious about the world they live in. An additional thing to remember is that our kids’ understanding of civics, politics, and voting isn’t going to be shaped by only what they learn from us. They too will go through school and learn about these topics, they will talk to friends, they will ask other adults questions, and they will form their own opinions. Don’t accept the pressure that says that your words will be the deciding factor for the way they choose to vote when they are voting in their first election.
I know that the comforting things are nice and warm, which is important. I also know that having tangible, implementable tools is just as important, so I wanted to offer a few of those, as well, when it comes to talking to kids about voting.
- Start with a question. Start the conversation by asking your kids what they think a leader is and see what questions they may have about community helpers (teachers, firefighters, police officers, the mayor, librarians, etc.). This can open the door to conversations about elected officials, the role they play, and why it matters that we get to elect the people who serve in a government role.
- Talk about your community. Instead of jumping into an election, the candidates and other items on the ballot, start by talking about the community you live in. Maybe take a walk and talk about which buildings are privately owned, and which are publicly owned. You can look at buildings such as the library, the courthouse, fire stations, police stations, schools, etc. for public entities and businesses, and homes and hospitals for private entities. This can open the door to discussions on public vs. private sectors, how they work together, and the importance of participating in the public/civic sector.
- Focus on the why. Rather than focusing on the “what” (the candidates, amendments, etc.), try focusing on why voting matters. Talk to your kids about the fact that voting gives people in a community the chance to work collectively on accomplishing a goal — electing people who will help improve the world they live in. Talk about democracy and what it would look like if we didn’t have a democracy and couldn’t vote.
At the end of the day, talking to our kids about voting and civic engagement isn’t a pass-or-fail test for us as parents. It’s a chance to help them understand the opportunities they have to play a role in the world they live in. It’s an incredible opportunity for us to walk alongside them as they begin to develop a sense of belonging to something bigger than themselves and their family. We get to help them learn that their voice matters, see that their questions are important, and their brains have the ability to think critically… and sometimes the most impactful way to do that is to not have all the answers and to let them lead the conversation.
