Listen, I know Beyoncé said that they can’t break our souls, but I think she may have been wrong. Because summer break is absolutely breaking my soul (or maybe my sanity? or both?). I mean, don’t get me wrong, my kids are two of my favorite humans in the entire world. I love them to the moon and back, and as my 7-year-old says, then some more. While that will never change, it’s also true that I also love a normal school day routine — the morning snuggles, the rush to get everything and everyone ready, the daily fight over brushing teeth, and alas, the long-awaited school drop-off.
During the school year, I get to kiss and hug my littles goodbye as I remind them to have a day full of kindness, fun, and learning. And then… I get to leave! I get to go to work and focus on projects, relationships, and a mission that fuels a different part of the human I am. It’s a daily release that is threatened by the very rude interruption that is summer break. I’m not advocating that our kids be in school year-round or that summer break should be canceled. In fact, I love that our kids and their incredible teachers get a break from the classroom in the summertime. The question I’m asking instead is why don’t summer camp hours mirror the hours of a normal school day? For parents, especially those of us who work, a 9-to-1 or 9-to-3 camp day forces us to try and cram 8+ hours of work into 4-to-6 hours, which as you may predict, is impossible.
READ: School’s Out… What Do I Do With My Kids All Summer? Woes From a Working Mom
My mental capacity for critical thinking, problem-solving, and long-term planning at work decreases during the summer as a direct result of my mom brain constantly functioning in overdrive. I’m already coordinating the drop-offs and the pickups, packing lunches and snacks, making sure there are dry and clean swim supplies in the camp bag, filling water bottles, and applying sunscreen, and by the time I’m home from said drop-offs (I work remotely), I only have 5.5 hours before I have to pause whatever I’m doing and leave for pickup duty.
Once the kids are home, I have to choose between letting them become screen goblins while I wrap up work for the next 2.5 hours or giving them the attention they very much deserve and then resuming my work once they’re in bed, which cuts into my normal chores and connection time with my partner. This reality forces me to choose between being a present, attentive mother and being a successful, innovative professional. It’s a choice that, regardless of which option I select, requires me to sacrifice a part of who I am in service of whichever need seems most urgent. It’s unfair and it’s exhausting, which is why I’m confessing to you today that I hate summer break.
READ: The Non-Summer of a Working Mom
Dropping my kids off for a full, normal day of school gives me the opportunity to nourish and challenge parts of myself that take a backseat when my kids are with me because #MomBrain. I love what I do for work (nonprofit fundraising and development), and while I do watch videos of my kids while they’re at school all day, I love that they are safe and loved by people whose job it is to be present and available for them during the day. I love that my kids go to school while I go to work. It’s a truth that I used to hide but now fully embrace. Summer break threatens the delicate balance of rhythms and routines that enable me to be my entire self every day. So, the countdown to school resuming on August 12th begins now!