Since I’ve pretty much established what a Grinch I am about Christmas, let me go one step further and also provide you with a list of presents you should not gift your children, and other people should not gift your children, unless they really don’t like you. In which case, buy away. In 14 years, I have learned the hard way about what a really good present is, and it is not any of these types of things.
Kits, Crafts, or Activities that a Parent Must Help With
Don’t buy your child something you’ll be stuck pouring over the instructions for, squinting at while the baby cries and dinner burns. Presents should help kids stay occupied without your help! Kiwi Kits are wonderful, and I am a big promoter of them for curious kids, but don’t buy ones your children can’t put together by themselves. Same with LEGOs. That LEGO Star Wars item may look really cool, but the four hours it’s going to take you to put it together are four hours of your life you will never, ever, get back. And then you get to dust it for the rest of your child’s residence in your home.
Messy Things
I love art, and we do a lot of art in our house. When I want to and when I have time. Not everyone feels this way about art. Therefore, don’t buy art or messy-type crafty things as presents. Don’t buy mermaid potion kits or slime kits, don’t buy the Pie Face whipped cream game or craft buckets or paint-the-unicorn kits. A present that results in a mess the parent then has to clean up is not a present.
Loud Things
Do you have a soundproof music room in your house? I thought not. Skip the recorders and drum sets, police cars with sirens, and singing baby toys.
Things with Batteries and Remotes
Do you want to replace batteries? Do you want to have to remember to buy batteries? Do you want to spend money on batteries? Do you have to find remotes? Remember which remote goes to which truck? Remember which cord goes to which truck to which remote?
Yeah.
Things with Many Pieces
Games and puzzles are cool. We do a lot of them. But make sure they are age-appropriate or don’t buy them. I don’t need to pick up one more hanging monkey, checker, Candy Land card, or ever pry a LEGO out of my foot ever again.
There’s my non-Christmas list. You’re welcome.
Love,
A Sage Old Grinch
