You don’t have to tell me you’re sorry. If this post does anything, I hope it simply makes us all think a little differently and maybe start an important conversation with our kids.
His name was Nolan Wells.
I will say his name. I will shed real tears. And I will use this moment to ask my son, “Who do you trust?”
In 2019, we moved to a predominantly white community in NE Florida. The very first weekend there, while playing in the backyard of people I love, my kindergartener and second grader were introduced to the N-word by other children.
That wasn’t the last time.
Months later, I knocked on a stranger’s door after their child called my son a monkey. I was told, “My son would never say that.” The only moment that seemed to create empathy was when I said, “Do you think I want to be knocking on a stranger’s door having this conversation? I’m literally shaking.”
I’ve had to report racist comments from one of my son’s own teammates, including being called a member of the “Black Monkey Society.” Again, I heard, “He would never say that.” Several students heard it.
About a month ago, I was awakened by a phone call from a parent determined to explain why her son hadn’t said anything racist. She even said, “You know how your son is.” The truth? I didn’t even know what she was talking about because my son hadn’t mentioned it. He didn’t come home upset. He didn’t even tell me.
Sadly, I think that’s because this wasn’t new to him.
I’ve sat with teachers, principals, school resource officers, friends, and strangers. I spoke with students in the Black Student Union at my son’s zoned high school. Fewer than 10% of the students are Black, and the stories they shared were heartbreaking. I held myself together while I was with them, then sobbed in my car afterward.
I thanked God my son ultimately chose musical theatre at a performing arts school in another county.
The reality is that I never know when an ordinary day will be interrupted by a racist comment directed at one of my children. It steals joy. It creates exhaustion. And while I don’t live angry, there is a layer of vigilance that never fully disappears. My children’s innocence didn’t disappear all at once. It was chipped away — one comment, one conversation, one incident at a time.
Now my friends can’t stop talking about Nolan because our kids move in circles that look a lot like his friend group.
No matter what happened that day, no matter what details eventually come out, I can’t stop thinking about the “what ifs.” They break my heart for Nolan. And as a mom, they terrify me.
So this is what I hope every parent will do.
Talk to your kids.
Ask them:
- Who do you trust?
- Why do you trust them?
- If something goes wrong, who has your back?
- What’s your plan to leave?
- What’s your code word? Your escape plan?
These are conversations many parents never think to have. For some of us, they are necessary.
And I want to be clear: This isn’t about saying everyone is racist. They’re not. Some of the greatest blessings in my life are people who don’t look like me. I treasure friends who listen, ask questions, and are willing to understand experiences they haven’t lived. Those are the people who help make our communities stronger.
I share this because awareness changes conversations. Conversations change choices. And maybe those choices change someone’s story.
About the Author
WJXT multi-Emmy-winning journalist Melanie Lawson is a trusted morning anchor and storyteller in Jacksonville, Florida, where she co-anchors the city’s top-rated morning news program. Each weekday, she helps lead more than five hours of live programming, anchoring the 6 a.m. and 9 a.m. newscasts while also hosting the station’s streaming lifestyle and community-focused show, News4JAX at 10:30.
Known for her authentic, energetic, and community-centered approach, Melanie also leads the station’s PositivelyJAX initiative, spotlighting stories that uplift, inspire, and connect Northeast Florida residents. Her work ranges from breaking news and in-depth interviews to community impact storytelling, live event coverage, and conversations focused on leadership, education, health, parenting, and personal growth.
Originally from Longwood, Melanie’s passion for communication and service began early. She graduated with honors from Hampton University with a degree in broadcast journalism and later earned a Master of Science in Communications Management from University of North Florida.
Melanie and her husband, fellow News4JAX anchor Tarik Minor, met while covering a news story and have now been married for 14 years. Together, they are raising two creative and active children, Noah Graceson and Layah Grace, while balancing family life, community service, and demanding careers in television news.
Beyond the anchor desk, Melanie is a sought-after emcee, moderator, speaker, and mentor who is passionate about helping others communicate with confidence and authenticity. She is deeply involved in the Jacksonville community through nonprofit partnerships, youth mentorship, leadership initiatives, and service organizations. Melanie is also an active member of First Baptist Church of Oakland in Jacksonville.
