Surviving a Forced ‘Life Pause’

life pauseI find myself swaying between peaceful bliss and enjoyment of the forced “life pause” all this has created — and losing my ever-loving mind. I imagine I am not alone in this ebb and flow and figured I would share my random musings in hopes that others may feel some semblance of camaraderie during these peculiar times.

I will title this first paragraph, simply, “Naw.” We are educating our kids at home. This is not homeschooling *inserts clapping hand emoji for emphasis*. As a mother who researched that option avidly and had a two-week stint as a working homeschooling parent while switching schools mid-year because the first one didn’t work out (that is deserving of its own blog), I can firmly and unequivocally proclaim, this is not homeschooling. I feel offended for homeschool parents and students worldwide at the comparison. Homeschool students have field trips, interaction with friends, a pre-planned curriculum, and so many other things that we, or they, for that matter, are not currently privy to. Most importantly, homeschoolers have a parent who made the choice to dedicate resources and time to take on the very important feat of being a teacher to their child. Listen, I decided that I did not have the homeschooling mother “calling on my life” and had interviewed two potential in-home teachers by week two of my aforementioned homeschooling experience, and that was a pre-life altering shutdown. All I am saying is that this would be better off categorized as something that starts with a B and ends with an S that maybe doesn’t have any other letters in between it and that we would be better off not mincing words or comparing the two.

Can we decide that referencing this time as the “new normal” as if any of what we are experiencing can be categorized as normalcy, is counterintuitive? I refuse to believe that not seeing my grandparents for fear of bringing in a sickness that could potentially lead to their demise is my new normal. I am not claiming a life of not seeing friends, or working out in a gym, or business/job instability, or widespread death, or no playdates, or no moms’ night out, or no beaches and no parks for anybody. Nope. Not ever. Not going to happen. And though I am not naïve enough to think, or want, things to miraculously go back to the way they were before, I have to believe that this time in our life is anomalous in order to keep putting one foot in front of the other. I know better times are coming. Plus, as a true Southerner who greets everyone with a smile, I am tired of worrying if I am smiling enough with my eyes during my masked trips to the grocery store.

If you happen to be someone who is coming out of this with a new hobby, or is now a self-help guru because of all the books you have been able to read, or is the proud new owner of a multimillion-dollar business because you finally have the opportunity to plan and execute, I give my sincerest of kudos to you. I mean it truly. However, for those of you who are shaming people who do not have the benefit of adding something new to their repertoire either from lack of time because you know, for many, this pandemic is akin to pouring water into an already full cup or because they have no interest in doing so (remember, NO is a full sentence), I have a few “hobbies” you can pick up at my house so I can be more like you. The only thing I am trying to learn through all of this is how not to lose my sanity. If you are not actively supporting those around you in that mission by keeping all those opinions and judgments to yourself, I have a new phrase for you to learn as your next hobby. Repeat after me. “Worry about yourself,” or for the old souls, “Mind the business that pays you.”

I feel the need to preface this by saying that I love my husband and kids and would not trade them for the world. BUT… Jesus, Mary, AND Joseph, I am not built to be around anyone this much. FULL STOP.

And on a final note, while I can write in jest as an effort to bring levity, I never want to belittle the seriousness of this moment in time. I am thankful for all essential workers who afford me the opportunity to hunker down healthily, and I am prayerful for all who have been negatively impacted.

Dominique Landry
Dominique Landry is a NASM certified personal trainer, group fitness instructor, and founder of Fit Enough LLC. She has been an athlete and a proponent of a healthy lifestyle for her entire life and created Fit Enough to change the current narrative of fitness to be more inclusive of all body types, fitness levels, and lifestyles. When she is not working to change the fitness industry, she can be found "doing this thing called life" with her husband and endlessly energetic children. If you enjoy a good laugh, straight talk, and lots of food, Dominique is your girl. Follow her on Instagram @fit_enough for a little food, a little fitness, a little fashion, and a lot of fun!

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