You Will Have Fun, I Said So

If there’s one thing I’ve learned about having young children, it’s that they are completely unpredictable. Trying to determine whether or not they will be happy or miserable in any situation is like playing the slots. But our goal is to offer our kids the opportunity to have fun. And we all know one of the best things about being a parent is being able to provide those moments of sheer joy.

Ok, sheer joy. This is easy. I can list one hundred things that would make my kids so incredibly happy. From booking a vacation to a quick trip to the park and everything in between. Special events are my favorite. Fire house tours, pottery painting, or most recently a trip to feed the dolphins at Marineland, fun! (Notice I said my favorite).

Then what happens? Meltdown? Tantrum? A fleeing child? Or worse, was I even able to get them in the car in the first place? It took me maybe 20 times to realize that as much fun as I want my son Brendan to have, I can’t force it, no matter how hard I try. And believe me, I TRY.

I’ve actually been wanting to write about this topic since we created this blog. Why? Because I see it happening all around me, all the time. Kids having meltdowns and screaming fits when they should be having fun. I mean, why aren’t they having fun?!?

There’s a saying I always think of when the same thing keeps happening over and over again, something about how many times do you need to bang your head against the wall…

Well, I finally stopped banging my head against the wall at one of the recent “fun” events I took Brendan to, the Fun Run Jax Stroller Strength does every year at Easter time (ironic that the word fun names the event). It was such a nice day, the rain held off, everyone was happy and the kids were so excited. Fellow contributor Mary Lauren was ready to lead the stretch for the kiddos….Ok, get the camera ready!

“Look Brendan, the kids are stretching, go stretch with them! Where are you going? Get in there, go stretch! This is fun! Look, look at the kids…. they’re having fun! Brendan! Brendan come back!”

….and he’s gone. What the hell? Ok, fine, so he won’t stretch, whatever he’s only running like 100 yards.

OK time for the run.

“Brendan, take your thumb out of your mouth. Line up. See the kids? Go line up. You can’t run with your thumb in your mouth Brendan.”

You get the picture.

So through my own frustration that this is not turning out the way I thought it would, I snap some pictures and move on. And off he goes to the playground and has the best time for an hour, doing what he really wants to do, his way. And on the way home we laugh about it and realize, AGAIN, that we can’t make him have fun.

Which brings us to the ultimate example of Oh My God Kid You BETTER Have Fun; Disney World.

Yes, we took both kids for a long weekend to Disney just a few days ago. The good news is I am so aware of his version of fun that I was really prepared. Believe it or not, I am learning to see the signs:

• The furrowed brow indicating the beginning of crankiness
• The “no, I don’t like this” look (or the insert thumb and say nothing moment)
• The “I’m outta here watch me run” shuffle

We saw the signs, we acted, and we saved the day.

I mean, think about it, so we didn’t go on It’s a Small World, who cares? He had way more fun sitting on a bench eating ice cream and dancing then he did waiting in a long line. Brendan is three and a half, so his fun at Disney is going to be different than lets say an eight-year-old (although I saw kids of all ages hysterically crying, including some regretful parents).

We did have some not-so-fun moments too, of course. And there were a few times where I had to stop myself from saying “HEY! We paid a lot of money for you to have fun here so HAVE FUN!”

No, I never went there this time. Instead, I let him have his own fun. If he wanted to climb on rocks, he did. If he wanted to look at the toys (every 10 steps), he looked. If he wanted to only eat strawberries at the huge buffet (deep breaths….hold it together… keep it together mom… and exhale), he only ate strawberries. Phew, and we did it. Disney World success. And so many awesome memories for my little family.

Do you have a trick to turn a bad day into a good day?